A boomer who’s comfortable in her own groove

We love learning about other baby boomers’ lives. And we just learned more than we ever knew before about the life of Philadelphia librarian and BoomerCafé contributor Roz Warren. Guess what: she’s perfectly comfortable in her own groove.

A lot of women, when they reach our age, resolve that it’s time to turn their lives around. They’re going to seize the day! Live with gusto! Strive to fill every waking moment with something new and exciting.

Not me. I don’t want to live life to the fullest each day. I’d rather stay home and read.

Roz Warren

Roz Warren

In my youth, I did some world traveling and, for a middle-class Jewish girl, had a certain number of adventures. Nothing extraordinary, lavish or — God forbid — self-destructive. I lived in London and Paris. I visited Bali and Singapore. I had a couple of love affairs. I did a little coke. But I never got drunk and woke up in a stranger’s bed, danced on a table top, or had a fling with a pop star.

(I did once spend an entirely platonic night with Leonard Cohen. But that’s another essay.)

By the time I hit my 30s, I’d gotten all of this out of my system. I got married, settled down, raised a kid, then got divorced. Now I work at my local public library. Mine is a quiet life. But, for me, it never gets dull.

I know three women who, now that their kids have grown, have cut loose and are seeing the world in style. Travel writers, they crisscross the globe having a fabulous time (often on somebody else’s dime) and blog about it.

Suzanne Fluhr chronicles her world travels on Boomeresque. Lois Alter Mark blogs about “transformative travel” on Midlife at the Oasis. And Scuba diver Tam Warner Minton shares exciting underwater adventures on Travels with Tam, accompanied by amazing fish photos.

These women really know how to live! Hobnobbing with lions and rhinos on a South African game preserve! Going to Australia with Oprah! Cage diving with Great White Sharks!

Tam Warner Minton diving to visit a large turtle.

Tam Warner Minton diving to visit a large turtle.

I’m one of the thousands of armchair travelers who enjoy their blogs. And there’s always something fabulous to read. Right now? Suzanne is relaxing in Hawaii. Lois and her husband are savoring fine cuisine in Aix-en-Provence. And Tam is under the waves in Cozumel, photographing cool fish.

But would I want to live like my three favorite travel writers?

Not a chance. I prefer my quiet, humdrum life. My days aren’t exceptional. They’re entirely ordinary. I read. I write. I swim. I walk the dog. I share coffee with friends.

Dealing with obstreperous patrons at the library where I work is as much adventure as I want.

I’m lucky enough to have a wonderful man in my life who also loves nothing better than to sit in front of the fire reading. Or visiting a bookstore. Or taking a stroll around my pleasant suburban neighborhood enjoying a chat and cracking each other up.

Friends often accuse me of being in a rut. “The whole world is out there!” they’ll say. “Get out and live a little.”

“It’s not a rut,” I correct them. “It’s a groove. And I love it.”

I think it’s great that so many of my peers in their 50s and 60s, are enjoying such exciting lives. “I can sleep when I’m dead,“ they proclaim. “In the meantime, I’m going to grab everything life has to offer.”

“You go, girl!“ I tell them. “See the world! Have amazing adventures! I look forward to sitting on my tushie in my easy chair and reading all about it.”

At 61, I’m old enough to recognize that a simple Ordinary Day can be bliss.

This piece first appeared on Zestnow.com.

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6 Comments on "A boomer who’s comfortable in her own groove"

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bobj
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LESS is MORE!
I totally agree.

Mister Wonderful
Guest

This is wonderful writing! But you did have a one-night-stand with Leonard Cohen. I read it in the Times. The New York Times. It’s now a matter of public record.

Mary
Guest

I am so glad you are marching to the tune of your own drummers.

Larry Checco
Guest

Great piece, Roz, and I loved the “Mr Cohen” story, as well. Not a typical librarian’s tale. Impressed and amazed at Mr. Cohen’s restraint. You do know, however, that we’re all taking you at your word. Haha.

Erin
Guest

Amen, Sister!
I enjoy those Jane Austen moments, reading, writing, drinking tea, and bonding with my cat.

Barb Parcells
Guest

I so relate to this! Give me a good book, a comfy chair and a big window to daydream out of and I am a happy camper. My 67th birthday is tomorrow and the forecast is stormy. My plans are to re-read a May Sarton journal -another woman who loved her solitude – and listen to the rain on the roof. What could be better than thst?

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