Believe us, we have never before been sent a story that put “sex life” and “hearing loss” in the same sentence. But there’s a first time for everything, and we want to thank freelance copywriter and blogger Roxanne Jones of Harpswell, Maine, for pulling it off. Her advice? Listen up!
We all know what happens as we baby boomers start getting a bit older. The television volume gets cranked up. We start watching people’s lips when they talk. We rely on a spouse or companion to “translate” what others are saying. And conversations can be both frustrating and hilarious. For example:
An online acquaintance recently wrote about how she heard “phone” when her husband said he’d misplaced his (mustache) comb, and she offered to call it so the ringtone would help him track it down.
Roxanne Jones
One evening a few months ago, my husband and I were watching a Netflix movie when I announced that I had to go to the bathroom – a cue for him to pause what we were watching (since he, of course, controls the remote). His reaction was, “Why do you have to do that now?” I rather snippily replied, “Because my bladder’s full, that’s why.” Then he got it. Turns out, he thought I’d said “I have to go vacuum” and was totally puzzled as to why I felt the need to do so in the middle of a movie.
But maybe the best misunderstanding we’ve had from mishearing happened in the boudoir, and went like this:
When we awoke one weekday morning before my husband retired (and we were still relative newlyweds), I suggested we have a fast amorous encounter – a quickie – before he had to get out of bed and off to work. He misheard me, however, and thought I’d offered him a cookie. Fastidious Felix Unger-like, his response was, “Why would I want a cookie at this hour? And wouldn’t we get crumbs in the bed?”
What’s behind it all? The experts tell us that hearing tends to be the last of our senses to go. But already, at midlife, it’s often one of the first to wane.
This age-related hearing loss is called presbycusis (toss that word out at your next cocktail party). As we age, structures inside our ears start to change and their ability to function declines (all those loud rock-and-roll concerts and cranked-up stereo speakers didn’t help us baby boomers, either). As a result, we start having trouble hearing high-frequency sounds, understanding someone when there’s background noise, or telling apart certain sounds.
Which just goes to show you, fellow boomers, hearing loss can affect your sex life. So listen up!
Thanks for a wonderfully humorous, yet educational post today. Thanks Roxanne!
You’re most welcome! Thanks for commenting, Eric.
Love this! You have such a wonderful, unique and quirky take on where we boomers are at this stage in our lives – so warm and funny! Cookies, anyone?!
Thanks, Pat. And the upside of partaking in these cookies is they’re calorie-free!
I resemble those remarks…too many live and up close Grateful Dead concerts and later, large, loud Diesel engines in the oil and gas business…so much so that we have seriously discussed hearing aids for me and yes, we do have our own humorous “mishearings” by yours truly but alas and alack, none that come to mind this morning…will read your piece to my wife and our next stop maybe the hearing aid store…thanking you…now my wife will know, she is not alone or did she just say “I’m on the phone”
Uncle Albert, it does my heart good to hear that you may be taking some action about your hearing loss as a result of reading my post. You may forego some funny “mishearings” in the future, but think of all you’ll gain! Thanks very much for commenting.
Great post, I really had a laugh, good thing I was reading it and not hearing it! But how do you pronounce “presbycusis”? I’d love to use that word at my next cocktail party!
Glad you enjoyed the post! “Presbycusis” is pronounced prez-be-cue-sis, with the emphasis on “cue.” I’m sure your friends will be impressed (if they can hear you, of course). Many thanks for commenting.
Great post Roxanne!
Hey, Dan – Great to see you here! Thanks for commenting!
LMAO!! That is so us too!!! Had similar presbycusis (what a great word!) incident. I asked my husband if he wanted a cookie but he thought I said nookie. When I came back with the cookie jar he was standing there with his pants round his ankles. Just kidding! Great post and pics.
Now I’m the one LMAO! That image of your husband…Thanks for commenting, Gilly!
Roxanne, I’ve heard your cookie story before but I laughed just as much as I did the first time. Actually, more because your pictures are hilarious!!
Well, the publishers DID say have fun with the photos! Thanks for commenting here, Diane!