Taking a Mulligan at Life
All of us baby boomers have been around long enough that there probably are a few “do-overs” we’d like to … well, to do over. Writer Perry Block has found a way to think about it that justifies every do-ever you do over. He calls it, Taking a Mulligan at Life.
I haven’t played much golf in recent years, but whenever I happen to summon the fortitude to hit the links, I frequently make use of a uniquely efficacious contrivance known as “the mulligan.”
Perry Block
A mulligan is a device whereby a golfer can negate an errant shot that goes careening into rough, lake, or trap. With a mulligan, the golfer simply wills the first shot into oblivion, tees up a second shot, and takes another chance at rendering success.
Which makes me wonder, especially as I get older: why aren’t there mulligans at life?
Our lives are replete with moves we’ve regretted, from spending an evening at a movie we were lukewarm about to spending a lifetime— some of us, anyway— with a spouse we lukehate. Every move we make, no matter how half-baked, ill-conceived, or totally lacking in reason, becomes locked into eternal permanency.
I for one have certainly pulled my share of rotten moves. Oh, why be modest? If there’s such a thing as quotas on butt-headed moves, I’ve filled mine and left you precious little room on yours.
Why is it that we can take mulligans at golf— which is, after all, nothing more than a frivolity devised years ago to justify our ancestors’ uttering of the “s” word in broad daylight— when we cannot take a mulligan at what constitutes the very most important aspect of our very lives? That is, our very lives themselves!
A few weeks ago, I was out on the course with a friend of mine, and I hit an incredibly bad drive on the first tee. The shot went sailing into a lake on the neighboring hole. What’s worse, the lake was filled with snapping alligators… unusual, to say the least, for a public course in the Philadelphia/Delaware Valley area.
“I can’t live with this,” I complained. “I’ve got to have a mulligan.”
I put my hand in my pocket and felt for a tee. I found one, but somehow I couldn’t make my fingers wrap around it. Very odd. “Get a grip, fingers!”
“You have a tee?” I called to my friend. He tossed me one. I seized it and tried to tee up my ball, but I couldn’t make the tee penetrate the ground.
“WTF!” I said. Yes, golf was also developed as a convenient rationale for unleashing the “f” bomb down among the sheltering pines at all hours prior to Happy Hour.
“I’m afraid,” my partner said, “that was a LIFE SHOT. And there are no mulligans at LIFE.”
“But I can’t accept that miserable shot,” I whined. “What can I do?”
“The best you can do,” he replied, “is develop philosophical acceptance of the situation and move on.”
Well, philosophical acceptance may have its merits, but a nice clean do-over is a damn lot more satisfying. So I gritted my teeth, dug the tee into the turf, and forged ahead.
A short while later it was time to pack up the clubs and head for the locker room. My score for 18 holes, without mulligans, was 107.
My score at life? 72!
Yeah, you’re right; I took a few mulligans. Why not?!?
Category: Perry Block
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You got that right Perry!
I started a total renovation of previous choices at age 49 when I lost my job and my career (soon after the midlife divorce!) I decided to become a writer as the Midlife Crisis Queen and now my specialty is encouraging everyone to quit taking it all so seriously and go with one big do-over.
My tagline: “There ARE do-overs before it’s all over!”
Thank you, Laura!
I’m glad there is someone to show us the way as to the proper manner of taking a mulligan at life. Although I was hoping to start calling myself “the Midlife Crisis Queen.”
Crap, there goes another lousy shot!